Blue Skies and Green Trees

                                                                              Blue Skies and Green Trees

“Close the damn window, it's 4pm!”

     It is certainly unfortunate to be stuck in such a society when I suffer from claustrophobia. I’ve lived all 18 years of my life behind closed doors, crowded in with my family of 3. Each of our rooms are 12x12 square feet. Thankfully, we were lucky enough to get an apartment with a couple of windows. I always find myself wandering around aimlessly in our ‘cozy’ apartment. I hate every inch of it. I spend most of my day studying, watching TV, and sleeping. I’m a nobody in this society. I’m incapable of studying and I already know I don't have a bright future ahead. Oh, and did I mention that I watch TV? Yeah, that’s basically our only form of entertainment. My mother especially enjoys commentating over every program that plays. It’s sort of amusing at times.

“Doesn’t he understand that she doesn't want to meet his father? I don’t understand this crap,” 

I hear my mother's familiar complaints, right before she turns off the TV. I get up with a grunt and walk up to her. 

She’s sitting on the couch next to my sister. I try to ask for the 3rd time: 

“Is it too early to go out?” 

Annoyingly enough, my mother laughs her heart out at the remark.

”What are you, an extrovert? Give me a break, of course not.” 

I start walking towards my room, and I hear my mother tell my sister, 

“Is he insane? It's literally 1 p.m. No one goes out at this time.” 

     I lie down on my bed, and wait for my family to turn the TV back on. Three… two… one…  and it’s playing again. Now I can finally leave. I grab my phone and jacket, then slowly make my way towards the familiar metallic door. I grab the worn out handle and close the door behind me. I take in the refreshing air I’ve missed for so long. I finally get to breathe it once more. 

Hsu, Sara. "China's Real Estate Sector Is Overstocked." 6 July 2016, thumbor.forbes.com

     I’m definitely not normal- in a way I’m a bit of a freak. To be completely honest, I’m a part of a group which is shunned by society; not in a negative way, but in more of a pitiful way. I’m considered an extrovert. It’s that type of word that isn’t really thrown around, yet everyone knows exactly what it means. An extrovert, to be exact, is a person that separates himself from the ‘inside’ society and spends their time outside. Due to societal pressures, many follow through with such a lifestyle. Extroverts fall into a depression at times like this, and can keep up with such a lifestyle for up to 10 years, and apparently I’m one of them. I kick around an empty Coke bottle that was left from the night before. 99% of this city only come out between 12-3 a.m- right before sunrise. The locked stores around are stripped empty with only a couple convenient stores open. On my right, a drunk man slowly makes his way across the street, making some inaudible noises. I look down at my feet, avoiding the cracks in the sidewalk because of an old childhood saying. I maneuver myself through narrow alleys between the 40-story skyscrapers, that have engulfed our city. Why must I be pressured by my family to study in my hell-hole of an apartment for 12 hours a day? I leave my apartment for most of the day- almost every day for the past 6 years. Just the thought of staying at home for 21 hours a day drives me insane. Its something I can't seem to get used to. If my mother knew, she would send me to a mental rehabilitation center- another hell-hole I’m not planning on going to.

     I feel a couple of buzzes in my pocket and hurriedly pull out my phone:three missed calls from my sister. Did something happen? Why is she calling all of a sudden? I unlock my cracked phone and quickly call my sister. “Hey, Hey, what happened? Is everything alright?” There’s a short pause and I hear her familiar voice.

“Where are you? Why aren't you home?” she’s panicking. 

“Yeah.. I’m in my room” I answer with my voice slightly shaking. 

“You’re clearly not. Mom is coming to get you.” I hang up as all the curse words I know fly out of my mouth.

     It’s the following week, and I had the greatest dream. It was about blue skies and green trees. It made me realize a couple of things. The way I’ve been living for the past years was a lifestyle that’s been hurting me from the inside out. What kind of empty life was that? It’s so funny to think, that I was ever in such a position. 

I hear a faint knock on the door, and I automatically know its my sister. She has a habit of knocking quietly. 

“Come in,” I say loudly

“Mom told me you’re claustrophobic, ‘apparently’, so she’s letting you open the window for once.” 

“Wow actually?- tell her I said thanks.”

     My sister walks over to the rusty window and opens it up for the first time in years. It has always been facing a grey building similar to ours, so I never felt inclined to look through it. I stand in front of the window and let my hands feel the wind. The cool breeze flows in between my fingers like golden silk. I close my eyes and stand for a few minutes. As I open them, something catches my eye. I spot something behind that same grey building. I see blue skies and green trees.

     I grab my jacket, this time leaving my phone behind, and slowly make my way towards the familiar metallic door. I grab the worn out handle and close the door behind me. I take in the refreshing air I’ve missed for so long. I finally get to breathe it once more. Old habits never change.